bitter fruit

So I just found out that my ex is getting a fat-ass disability payment from the VA. First let me say that he totally deserves it because the Army screwed him every which way that they could. But you know I can't deny being a little bitter about this turn of events. Now that he's his own separate entity, not obliged to have anything to do with me (though I will say that we have maintained a good relationship), all sorts of good things are happening for him. He has a good job and now he'll be getting a nice little tax-free monthly stipend. So why the bitterness? Now that my life is slowly vortexing into a big pile of poo, everybody else's life seems to be percolating nicely. Sonuvabitch, where is the balance in life? HUH?!?! Where the hell is it??? And yes I realize this probably makes me sound like a vengeful, heartless, selfish bitch but since I know it's far more complicated than what this post can express, I can live with people thinking that.