eyes wide shut

My head is HUGE! No doubt about it. I can't wear women's hats because they often don't fit my massive cranium. I also have trouble finding glasses that flatter my ginormous head. But I never realized that, in addition to my monstrous noggin, my eyes are incredibly far apart, until I noticed that I have to adjust the microscope lenses after EVERYBODY...even the men. And everybody has to adjust them after me, several centimeters in fact. I guess that makes me some kind of opticular FREAK! But I think I remember reading something about people with wide-spaced eyes appearing more trustworthy, as opposed to beady-eyed people...so maybe that's why I get all the boob talk. Hmmmm.