adventures in babysitting

It's not that I don't like children...well okay, maybe I don't like children who aren't blood related. But mostly, it's the responsibility involved in caring for children that I don't particularly enjoy. I watched my brother's girls yesterday and it wasn't as much fun as just going to their house and visiting. There were many responsibilities and too much rule enforcement. I admit it, I'm totally selfish and frankly I just want to be the fun aunt. The one they can play Barbies with and who will join in when they have fart contests. I want to recklessly chase them around the house while they carry scissors. I want to make toast while sitting on the ledge of the tub as they take their nighty-night baths. I want to teach them dirty words and slip them a twenty so they can go out and buy make-up for their first clandestine meeting with the boyfriend their parents hate. I don't want to yell at them and create boundaries. I don't want to not buy things because of the choking hazards and mercury filling. And certainly, I don't want to be in any kind of situation where I have to take advice from Dr. Phil. What's fun about that? Kids should be more like dogs. You love your dogs, they love you...even when they're in their teen years. You can leave them in the car with the windows down when you need to run into the drug store for one of mommy's little helpers. You get to leave them at home when you want to go out and eat. They lick their own butts so bathing is optional. Seriously, it doesn't get more perfect than that.